Friday, May 23, 2008

Great one liners

"Great thinkers have always encountered opposition from mediocre minds." - Albert Einstein

A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.

A conclusion is simply the place where you got tired of thinking.

A gentleman is a patient wolf.

A little inaccuracy sometimes saves a ton of explanation.

A smart man covers his ass, a wise man leaves his pants on.

Admit nothing, deny everything and make counter-accusations.

Adult: One old enough to know better.

All work and no play, will make you a manager.

Better late than really late.

Great minds discuss ideas. Average minds discuss events. Small minds discuss people.

I don't mind coming to work, but that eight hour wait to go home is a bitch!

If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.

Love is a temporary insanity curable by marriage.

Never get into fights with ugly people, they have nothing to lose.

Once the toothpaste is out of the tube, it's hard to get it back in.

Smile, it's the second best thing you can do with your lips.

The dumber people think you are, the more surprised they're going to be when you kill them.

Veni, vedi, visa. I came. I saw. I did a little shopping.

Viewer discretion may be advised, but it's never really expected

We live in a society where pizza gets to your house before the police.

When I was young I was told that anyone could be president. Now I'm beginning to believe it.

You don't have to explain something you never said.

You will be a winner today. Pick a fight with a four-year-old.

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